PANICKING & SORTING

I've always had problems staying optimistic all the time. I do try to look at the positive side of most situations but its really not that easy.

I have periods where nothing according to me is right. I turn into a monster during those moments. I have no clue how my parents bear with all the tantrums and screaming sessions. The fact that they still let me stay with them is testimony to how patient they are :)

Over the years I've tried to find ways and means to try to make these mild panic attacks pass without causing too much emotional damage to people around me.

Last night I discovered yet another effective way!

It was a perfect day. The Lakshmi Nagar trip couldn't have gone better. I found the place, reached on time and the people were all really nice. For some strange reason I had one of my major panic attacks in the evening. There was absolutely no way I was going to start third year in such a foul mood. So I:

• Arranged all my books subject wise.

• Took out all my shoes/sandals and re-arranged them, categorising them into heels and flats.

• Took out everything from the dressing table and cleaned and threw away all the useless stuff, in the process discovering the obscene number of hair bands I possess.

• I found two old pairs of spectacles, both haven't been touched in years.

• I then decided to wash a couple of my suits. OK, it was one suit but for somebody whose always used a washing machine it was a lot.

• I cleaned out the pencil box, sharpened two new pencils and found a couple of pens I could use.

• I found the college bag and tried to fit in as much as I could ( I almost sound like a five year old whose going to school for the first time).

• I looked through my cupboard and decided what to wear.

• I then ironed the clothes.

By the time I finished it was quarter to one and the feeling had passed.

Hopefully, next time a lot less cleaning and sorting will do the job.